Should You Share Every Sexual Fantasy With a Partner?
We've all got our little secrets. But what happens when you've got a sexual fantasy that you'd really love to try, yet you're absolutely terrified of telling your partner?
Perhaps you're a gentleman who's always fancied being pegged, but you're worried your wife might look at you differently. Maybe you're a woman who's curious about domination, or you've both secretly wondered what a threesome would be like... without having the slightest idea how to bring it up.
So, should you keep your kinky little secrets to yourself, try them with one of our professional London mistresses, or finally tell your partner what's been going through that filthy mind of yours? Let's find out, shall we?
Contents:
- Do You Need to Share Every Sexual Fantasy?
- Does Having a Fantasy Mean You Have to Try It?
- Why Are Some Sexual Fantasies So Difficult to Admit?
- Why Explore Your Fantasies With a Professional Mistress?
- Which Fantasies Can You Explore With Our London Mistresses?
- Can Trying a Fantasy First Make It Easier to Discuss?
- What About Threesomes and Sharing a Partner?
Do You Need to Share Every Sexual Fantasy?
Not at all. Just because you're in a happy relationship doesn't mean you need to tell your partner every naughty little thought that's ever crossed your mind.
Having private sexual fantasies is completely normal, whether you've been married for twenty years or have only recently started seeing someone. Some fantasies might be things you'd genuinely love to explore together, while others are simply scenarios you enjoy imagining, with absolutely no intention of ever acting upon them.
Interestingly, a study published in The Journal of Sex Research found that just over 69% of 287 participants had disclosed a sexual fantasy to their partner, with more than 80% of those who had shared one describing the experience positively. However, the researchers also found that some people deliberately kept certain fantasies private, including those who simply enjoyed having their own little fantasy life.
So, whilst the figures are encouraging, it doesn't mean your partner will necessarily welcome everything you've been imagining, or that sharing every fantasy is somehow essential for a healthy relationship. Sometimes, keeping a few kinky thoughts to yourself is perfectly fine. Of course, before deciding whether to share a particular fantasy, there's another question worth asking yourself... do you actually want to experience it, or do you simply love the thought of it?
Does Having a Fantasy Mean You Have to Try It?
Just because you've spent a long time fantasising about a particular activity doesn't necessarily mean you'll enjoy doing it.
Take humiliation, for example. Perhaps the idea of being verbally degraded by an attractive woman is a tremendous turn-on. In your imagination, you're perfectly comfortable being laughed at and ordered about. But when somebody starts speaking to you that way, you might discover that certain words or insults might hit harder than you thought they would.
Something else worth noting is that the activity itself might not be the most important part of your fantasy. For example, a guy who regularly imagines his wife dominating him might be more interested in surrendering responsibility than experiencing physical punishment. Perhaps what excites him is the thought of somebody else making all the decisions, rather than being tied up or receiving a painful spanking. Likewise, somebody fantasising about a threesome might find watching their partner get intimate with somebody else is rather uncomfortable.
Put simply, it's worth figuring out exactly which part of the fantasy appeals to you before attempting to recreate the whole thing.
Why Are Some Sexual Fantasies So Difficult to Admit?
For many men, the embarrassment surrounding certain fetishes has less to do with the activity itself and more to do with what they think their partner will assume about them.
Some heterosexual men worry that admitting an interest in strap-on play might make their partner question their sexuality... some might worry that expressing an interest in submission will make them appear weak, especially if they're usually the more assertive person in the relationship. A man might enjoy wearing stockings, heels, lingerie, or latex clothing, yet worry that his partner will interpret this as a statement about his gender identity rather than a particular fetish.
Women certainly aren't immune to these concerns, either. A woman who wants to experiment with domination might worry that her partner will find the idea intimidating. Alternatively, someone who's curious about being submissive may feel embarrassed admitting that she enjoys a power dynamic that's completely different from her everyday personality.
Then you have fantasies involving other people, including threesomes, cuckolding, and various forms of consensual non-monogamy. These can feel particularly difficult to discuss because your partner might interpret them as evidence that you're dissatisfied with the relationship, even when that's not what you mean.
The problem is that once you've shared something particularly personal, you can't exactly take back what's been said. Even if your partner responds politely, you might find yourself wondering whether they're secretly judging you. And that, of course, is one of the reasons some people prefer to understand their fantasies properly before deciding whether to bring them into their relationship.
Why Explore Your Fantasies With a Professional Mistress?
Hoping to explore a fantasy for the first time with an equally inexperienced partner? Yeah... that's a recipe for disaster. Neither of you knows which equipment to use, how the different activities feel, or whether either of you will particularly enjoy the experience. You might spend half the evening fumbling with restraints, then walk away from the experience feeling pretty underwhelmed.
With an experienced Mistress, however, things can be approached differently. She can help you understand what your fantasy involves, explain which activities might suit your experience level, and introduce suitable elements gradually. If, say, you're interested in bondage, you might begin by experiencing how properly fitted cuffs differ from rope restraints, and discover whether you enjoy the feeling of restricted movement before attempting anything more demanding. If humiliation is what interests you, an experienced Domme can discuss which forms of verbal treatment appeal to you rather than throwing random insults at you.
The point is, with a mistress, you can discover which elements you really enjoy without needing to know everything beforehand. For someone curious about exploring a new fetish, being with a woman who's already familiar with the equipment, terminology, and different ways of approaching the experience can be much less intimidating than attempting to figure everything out with an equally clueless partner.
Which Fantasies Can You Explore With Our London Mistresses?
Well, quite a few, actually! Bed Domination offers a rather impressive selection of BDSM services, so whether your interests involve something gentle or a more elaborate fetish, you'll find plenty of experienced companions worth considering.
Always wondered what being pegged feels like? Our strap-on escorts specialise in this particular activity, so an interested beginner can discuss suitable equipment, preparation, comfort, and what to expect before considering an agreed session.
Have you always wanted to wear lingerie, stockings, or heels, but you don't own any suitable clothing and have never had the confidence to explore the idea properly? Some of our cross-dressing escorts have extensive experience with these fantasies. Depending on the lady and her available wardrobe, you may be able to explore different outfits, experiment with your appearance, and discover which aspects of dressing up you enjoy.
Some of you might want to explore all the aspects of being a Dom. Luckily, our submissive escorts offer an opportunity for interested clients to explore that role with a professional who understands both sides of power exchange. If you're completely new to taking charge, you can discuss your experience level and the type of scenario you'd like to try before arranging a booking.
Of course, these are only a handful of the services available through Bed Domination. We also offer bondage, foot fetish, spanking, latex, humiliation, chastity, and plenty of other interesting disciplines. If you're interested in combining particular fetishes, check her profile and confirm the details with our receptionists beforehand.
Can Trying a Fantasy First Make It Easier to Discuss?
Absolutely, and this is something worth considering if you've spent years worrying about a fantasy that you've never actually experienced.
One of the difficulties with sharing an unfamiliar fetish is that you might not be able to explain what you want particularly well. You know the general idea excites you, but when your partner starts asking questions, you suddenly realise you've got few answers. But if you've already explored the fantasy with an experienced Mistress, you'll have a much better understanding of what you enjoy and which parts you'd rather avoid.
And if you've discovered that the fantasy isn't nearly as enjoyable as you expected? Well, you've learned something useful without needing to ask your partner to indulge in something that neither of you might particularly enjoy.
What About Threesomes and Sharing a Partner?
The threesome is probably one of the most commonly discussed sexual fantasies, and certainly one that can become more complicated once you start considering how to make it happen.
Perhaps you've always imagined enjoying a threesome with your wife or girlfriend, but you're worried she'll think you're simply looking for an excuse to be intimate with another woman. Alternatively, maybe you're both interested in the idea but haven't got the slightest clue where you'd find a suitable third person. This is where booking an experienced professional can offer some genuine advantages.
At Bed Domination, our couples escorts in London are accustomed to meeting partners who want to explore new experiences together, including first-timers who might be feeling a little nervous. There's no expectation that either of you will pursue a romantic relationship with the third person afterwards, and you don't have to spend weeks trying to find someone who's interested in exactly the same arrangement.
Before arranging anything, we'd recommend discussing which activities you're both comfortable with, how you'd like the professional to interact with each of you, whether there are particular forms of contact you'd prefer to avoid, and what should happen if either partner begins feeling uncomfortable. If one of you isn't comfortable with the idea, the fantasy can remain exactly that until you're both happy to consider it.
Considering your first couple's experience? Read our blog on why couples visit a dominatrix together and explore the different ways a professional Mistress can become part of an agreed shared experience.
To Share or Not to Share?
Well, that depends entirely on the fantasy, your relationship, and whether it's something you really want to experience.
There's nothing wrong with keeping certain sexual thoughts to yourself. But for those interests you've been curious about for years, exploring them in an appropriate professional setting can help you discover what you enjoy, what you're comfortable with, and whether there's anything you'd eventually like to introduce into your relationship.
So, whether you've been secretly dreaming about being dominated, have always fancied trying a little strap-on play, or are simply curious about something you've never dared mention out loud, why not browse our gorgeous London Mistresses and discover which ladies specialise in your favourite fetishes?
